Respite Care for Family Caregivers in California: How to Get a Break

Caring for an elderly parent or another family member can gradually become a second job. You may still be working, raising children, managing your own health, or simply reaching the point where you cannot be responsible for care every hour of every day.

Needing time away from caregiving does not necessarily mean that your family member has to move out of the home. Respite care is temporary help that can give a family caregiver time to rest, work, attend appointments, handle other responsibilities, or recover from exhaustion.

What does respite care actually mean?

Respite is temporary relief from caregiving. Instead of permanently replacing the family caregiver, another person or service takes over some care responsibilities for a limited period.

The services available and the rules for receiving them vary by program and local area. That is why it can be more useful to describe the care problem you are trying to solve rather than simply asking whether you “qualify for respite.”

Start with how much of a break you actually need

A caregiver who needs three hours to attend an appointment may need a different solution from someone who cannot safely leave a parent alone during an eight-hour workday.

Think about the tasks that must happen while you are away. Does your family member need only companionship and supervision? Do they need help using the bathroom, bathing, eating, taking medications, transferring, or moving safely around the home? Do they have dementia and risk wandering?

Those details help determine whether a volunteer service, adult day program, in-home respite worker, personal care service, or a more intensive care arrangement may be appropriate.

Ask your local Area Agency on Aging about caregiver support

California's Area Agencies on Aging coordinate services for older adults and caregivers in local communities.

The federal Family Caregiver Support Program is administered through this aging network. Services can include information and assistance, counseling, caregiver training, support groups, respite care, and other supplemental support.

California's Department of Aging provides a county-based tool for finding local aging services. You can also call the statewide information line at 1-800-510-2020 to be connected with aging services in your area.

Caregiver Resource Centers are another important option

California also has a statewide network of Caregiver Resource Centers serving families across all 58 counties.

The centers focus on family caregivers of adults affected by chronic, disabling, cognitive, or other conditions that create significant care needs. Depending on eligibility, individual circumstances, and the local center, support can include assessment, care planning, counseling, education, referrals, and respite assistance.

This can be especially useful when you know that you are overwhelmed but are not sure what combination of services would make caring at home sustainable.

What if you cannot afford private respite care?

Do not assume that hiring a private caregiver entirely out of pocket is your only option.

Ask the local aging or caregiver organization whether there are publicly funded, subsidized, grant-supported, volunteer, or other caregiver assistance programs available for your situation. Eligibility and availability differ, and some services may have waiting lists or limited funding.

If your family member needs ongoing help with personal care and daily activities rather than only an occasional break, respite may be only one part of the solution. Other programs, including California's In-Home Supportive Services (IHSS) for eligible people, may also be worth exploring.

See our guide to California IHSS caregiver help for more information.

What if a few hours of respite is no longer enough?

Sometimes caregiver exhaustion is a sign that the entire care arrangement needs to be reconsidered.

If your parent cannot safely be left alone, needs substantial assistance throughout the day or night, is falling frequently, is wandering, or has medical needs that the family cannot safely manage, the question may be bigger than finding occasional respite.

In that situation, it can help to evaluate what would be required to keep the person safely at home and whether enough formal and informal support can realistically be assembled.

If it cannot, other care settings may need to be considered. Asking that question is part of care planning; it does not mean that a move is automatically necessary.

If you are already overwhelmed, start with these steps

If you are not sure where to begin, our broader guide to family caregiver support in California explains the main entry points.